Thursday, August 21, 2014

5 Ways To Suck At Blogging


Don't Blog
Just don't show up to your blog for days and days at a time, even after you said you were going to. This is my go-to when I want to really suck at blogging.

Don't Do What You Said You Were Going To Do
That's exactly what it sounds like. "I'll be back tomorrow with a post about blahblahblah" and don't come back. "I'll tweet out your blog post links" and don't tweet them out. People love this.

Don't Reply To Comments
Someone comments on your blog and you get a nifty little email, making it ridiculously easy to reply to them. But don't. Just don't. Just read the email, put it in the folder labeled "COMMENTS" with the intention of going back and emptying that folder later and moving things into the sub-folder called "REPLIED", and simply ignore those comments for forever. This one is a crowd pleaser.

Don't Read Any Other Blogs
Because if you're really serious about this whole "sucking at blogging" thing, then you obviously don't want to read about how awesome everyone else is at blogging. Obviously.

Provide Nothing Of Substance Upon Your Return
When you do decide you're going to come back to Blogland and you're going to write a post, make sure, MAKE ABSOLUTELY SURE that you don't provide the people with anything worth actually reading. This is essential. Practically Bad Blogger 101 stuff here, people.


That's it. Five simple ways to suck at this whole blogging thing. No need to thank me for this wisdom, it was my pleasure, really.

*disclaimer: the only blogger i'm referring to in this post is myself and only myself, so no need to get your panties in a twist*

15 comments:

  1. Haha, this list could definitely apply to me (more often then it should)! My comment emails were going to an old account and I had 9 months worth of them that I hadn't even read!

    Thanks for the laugh this morning!

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  2. Hilarious and so true!

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  3. I just miss your blogging and I want you to come back for good! I'll never refer to you as a bad blogger!! We'll just pretend your absence never happened, how's that?

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  4. Haha I feel like this could apply to me as well! Thank you for making my being awake at 2am worth it!

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  5. gurrrllll how dare you talk about me in such a manner ;)

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  6. This is me every few months. I just finished clearing out my inbox of comments from the last few weeks, only to find comments from last December that I never replied to. Whoooops...

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  7. Haha...I'm guilty of a few of these myself. Womp womp. A goal of mine is to manage my time better this year! Lets hope I can stick to it!

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  8. I'm the best bad blogger ever. Is there an award for this?

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  9. Only about you? Because it reallyyyy sounds like it's about me. Like, I could definitely post this on my blog and everyone would totally think it was about me. I could also switch the title to "How I fail at all of my blogging goals." Whoops!

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  10. Pretty sure I do all of these too...

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