Just don't show up to your blog for days and days at a time, even after you said you were going to. This is my go-to when I want to really suck at blogging.
Don't Do What You Said You Were Going To Do
That's exactly what it sounds like. "I'll be back tomorrow with a post about blahblahblah" and don't come back. "I'll tweet out your blog post links" and don't tweet them out. People love this.
Don't Reply To Comments
Someone comments on your blog and you get a nifty little email, making it ridiculously easy to reply to them. But don't. Just don't. Just read the email, put it in the folder labeled "COMMENTS" with the intention of going back and emptying that folder later and moving things into the sub-folder called "REPLIED", and simply ignore those comments for forever. This one is a crowd pleaser.
Don't Read Any Other Blogs
Because if you're really serious about this whole "sucking at blogging" thing, then you obviously don't want to read about how awesome everyone else is at blogging. Obviously.
Provide Nothing Of Substance Upon Your Return
When you do decide you're going to come back to Blogland and you're going to write a post, make sure, MAKE ABSOLUTELY SURE that you don't provide the people with anything worth actually reading. This is essential. Practically Bad Blogger 101 stuff here, people.
That's it. Five simple ways to suck at this whole blogging thing. No need to thank me for this wisdom, it was my pleasure, really.
*disclaimer: the only blogger i'm referring to in this post is myself and only myself, so no need to get your panties in a twist*