Bought A Jet, What Do You Expect?

Let's chat today about lyrics.

I was driving last night and absolutely blasting this song.

Talk Dirty (ft. 2 Chainz) - Jason Derulo

It should be noted that I like a little bit of everything when we're talking about music. I'm really, really not that picky and my list of favorite songs is approximately 2,389 miles long. So back on point.. I was driving and blasting this song and singing along, because when I'm in my car I pretend I'm auditioning for The Voice with every song that comes on. The acoustics are fabulous in my car you guys, I'm telling ya.
As I'm screaming singing this song, I guess I just really started to think about what I was saying. So I came home and decided to analyze the lyrics to this song.

I'm that flight that you get on, international
First class seat on my lap, girl, riding comfortable
Cause I know what da girl dem need
New York to Haiti
I got lipstick stamps on my passport, make it hard to leave

I'm gonna stop you right there for a second, Jason. I appreciate your creativity in comparing sex to flying. Bravo, really. I just imagine that a flight from New York to Haiti is quite long and have you actually sat on someone's lap for a long period of time? It's not comfortable for anyone. I'm just saying.

Been around the world, don't speak the language
But your booty don't need explaining
All I really need to understand is when you
Talk dirty to me
Talk dirty to me
Talk dirty to me
Talk dirty to me
Get jazzy on me

Okay Jason, let me see if I follow this correctly.. I assume we're still comparing sex with you to flying and traveling. If I follow that, then it kind of sounds like you've traveled a lot but you still don't speak the language, which is fine. Except that if someone has been around the world (had a lot of sex) and they still don't "speak the language" then maybe they aren't as educated as they seem (aka, not very good at sex). I don't know. I also don't really understand what "get jazzy on me" means, what is "jazzy"? I'm not sure I want any of your "jazzy" on me. *smirk*

You know the words to my songs, no habla Inglés
Our conversations ain't long, but you know what is
I know what the girl dem want
London to Taiwan
I got lipstick stamps on my passport, I think I need a new one

These are actually the lyrics that made me write this blog post. "Our conversations ain't long, but you know what is".. HAHAHAH I'm immature. Oh, and he says "you know the words to my songs, I don't speak english".. Which, okay. Clearly.

Uno: met a friend in Rio
Dos: she was all on me-o
Tres: we could ménage à three-o
Cuatro: Ohhhhhh

Jason, I took French in high school, but I'm fairly certain that adding "o" to the end of words does not make them Spanish. Also, I'm pretty sure (but don't quote me on this) that they speak mostly Portuguese in Rio. You wish you could menage a three-o with some of those Brazilian girls, buddy.

Dos Cadenas, close to genius
Sold out arenas, you can suck my p*nis
Gilbert Arenas, guns on deck
Chest to chest, tongue on neck
International or*l sex
Every picture I take, I pose a threat
Bought a jet, what do you expect?
Her pu**y so good I bought her a pet
Anyway, every day I'm trying to get to it
Got her saved in my phone under "Big Booty"
Anyway, every day I'm trying to get to it
Got her saved in my phone under "Big Booty"

I had to add lots of "**" because I don't want those search terms to lead people to my blog, ya know? How awkward. Anyway, this is 2 Chainz part. Let's start top to bottom. I looked it up "Dos Cadenas" is 2 Chainz in Spanish. So there's that. Also, Gilbert Arenas is a basketball player for the Shanghai Sharks, so unless I'm missing something I don't get why we threw his name in there. And I've seen you 2 Chainz.. you pose zero threat is any and all pictures you take. You aren't that hot, buuddddddd. I'm ignoring the whole pet part, because.. come on, at least be clever.
BUT "got her saved in my phone under Big Booty" makes me LOL. I save guys in my phone as "Small D*ck" and "Bro Who Skips Leg Day" all the time!!

From there we just keep talking dirty to him, so I'll end it now.
This was fun. Let me know if you have another song I can analyze.
PS. talk dirty to me.